"Darth Norpois" or "Bringing up Bébé"?

by Rebecca Valette

 

For Proust's contemporary French reader (as opposed to today's American reader), the Marquis de Norpois' exchanges with the Narrator, in the early pages of "Madame Swann at Home" (as discussed at the end of the Notes on the February 1 Meeting below) are not at all vicious. Indeed, in traditional French schools, teachers repeatedly tell their students how ignorant and inept they are, with the aim of egging them on to better performance. The more talented the student, the harsher the criticism.

 

 

Let me share with you a few paragraphs I wrote on this topic in a recent article about the French Flute School. (I would be happy to share the entire article with members who might be interested.) 

 

Criticism as an Educational Stimulus

Given the traditionally high social expectations of French society, parents recognize that it is their duty to prepare their children for the rigors of the outside world. French toddlers at a playground are admonished to keep their clothes clean and not wander too far away, while American parents simply tell their children to "go have fun." This more positive, optimistic American view of life runs counter to the more pessimistic, or realistic, French beliefs. American children read The Little Engine That Could and, when they begin school, their teachers and the media encourage them to believe that they can be all that they want to be. French children, on the other hand, read cautionary tales warning them of the wolf lurking in the forest, and in school they are reminded by parents and teachers that they need to study hard and that success is not guaranteed. 

Whereas American society promotes "self-esteem" which can quickly become an unproductive sense of entitlement, French society makes it clear that success is a rare prize which needs to be earned. Thus at a soccer game, for example, when a youngster misses a goal, the American parents tend to praise their child's efforts ("That was a good try") and focus on the next play, while French parents will express a critical opinion ("You should have aimed more to the right"). In America, criticism when given is done in private, so as not to shame the child publicly. In France, critical remarks are made in public, since shame is thought to be an incentive for the child to perform better the next time.

When it comes to flute playing, the French conservatory method consists of group lessons, where students take turns performing and being criticized in front of their classmates. Teachers are accustomed to using irony which to the outsider may appear to be verbal abuse. French students, however, are accustomed to this type of severity and take it in stride. Inwardly they promise themselves not to make the same mistake the next time. 

When Marcel Moyse was teaching in the United States, he would utter the types of exaggerated criticisms that he had been accustomed to in France: "You play like shit." "You play like a Nazi [without emotion]." "You know nothing! Nothing about music!" "You should [give up the flute and] go tend cows." Many American students were deeply upset by such perceived "cruelties", not realizing that this was simply Moyse'sway of trying to shock them into better performance. Indeed, as Trevor Wye noted,Moyse reserved his severest criticism for the most advanced students and could be very patient with the less talented ones. Students who learned to focus on his constructive criticism found him to be an excellent mentor.

For Jean-Pierre Rampal, also, criticism was an important part of instruction. When working in Nice with American flutists who were themselves teachers in the States, he would explain: "It's the trouble in America. If students have no rhythm, teachers are afraid to tell them and be strong for fear of giving them a complex.... You must be strong and tell a student he is terrible. Don't take it easy."

Both French and American flute teachers wish to bring out the best in their students and to encourage a high level performance and a love of music. They simply have two very different culturally-determined ways of mentoring.

Comments

[Tom C.]

Very interesting, Rebecca. Thank you for this. I'm still not convinced, though, that Norpois does not have a more debilitating purpose in mind than mere mentoring. I guess I'm more with the author Bergotte when he says of Norpois: "But he's an old goose!... He keeps on pecking at you because he imagines all the time that you're a piece of cake, or a slice of cuttle-fish" (ML, 186). I think a more mentoring relationship is expressed in the way that Bergotte discusses the actress Berma's performance in Phèdra with the Narrator. When they disagree about the green light effect in the play, he remarks: "I must say, myself, that I don't care for it much, it bathes everything in a sort of sea-green glow, little Phèdra standing there looks too like a branch of coral on the floor of an aquarium. You will tell me, of course, that it brings out the cosmic aspect of the play. That's quite true. All the same..." And he goes on. Educating, listening, acknowledging a diversity of viewpoints, but drawing sharp distinctions all the same.

[Heather Clague]

This is a hot controversy these days - from Amy Chua's Tiger Mother and now Pamela Druckerman's adulation of French parenting (see recent WSJ article http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052970204740904577196931457473816.html). I'm hardly offended by descriptions of our American parenting foibles, many of which are quite correct(that excessive praise underminds self confidence, that children are not helped by parents who can't be authoritative, etc). However, I object to the idea that the only other option to educating children is to be overtly sarcastic, insulting and negative. Shame is a notoriously difficult emotion to regulate, and I would argue that public humiliation is NOT the best way to motivate people to strive for excellence. There are plenty of French people who can testify to the deleterious effects of the "French way" including one of our wonderful EB teachers who did not feel helped or inspired by having her cahier thrown across the room in disgust by her teacher. There is a lot of space between coddling and abuse - lots of room for engaging, educating, critiquing, listening...

[Lucie]

Wow, the French way sounds really harsh. I am glad I wasn't raised in such a country. Wait. I was. Either I have blocked off the traumatizing memories or I got lucky.

Jokes aside. Yes, there are some cultural differences in the upbringing of children between America and France but they are subtle, IMHO. Bad teachers and stupid people happen in every culture. I highly doubt Narpois is supposed to be a positive character, any way you slice it.

[Rebecca Valette]

My earlier reflection on Norpois and French education was not meant to imply that Norpois was a good mentor. Au contraire, he is pompous and unsupportive.

What is true is that, generally speaking, the French in conversation tend to criticize first and make positive comments second, while Americans do it the other way around. "I really found the movie rather boring. Actor X overplayed his role. However, there were some really beautiful scenes of Paris." vs. "I loved the way Paris was portrayed in the movie. It made me want to go back. The film itself, though, was a bit boring, and Actor X was too pompous."